what good is love if there's no one to share it with?

so i would normally write this down in my journal, but i want feedback

my greek professor was talking about something that really hit home. he was talking about eros (unrequitted lust, not a flimsy cupid with a bow and arrow). in Hesiod's Theogony, eros is one of the original cosmogonic forces and precedes even the olympian gods. zeus et alii are subject to eros, for its a force much greater than they are

when a human being has to bear the weight of eros, it becomes crippling. eros has to be transferred to other passions, but in its raw form it is too much for a human to handle.

and i can totally relate to that. sometimes i get so overwhelmed in just wanting a guy, im just attracted to anything male. but having heard my professor speak of this, alot has come into perspective.

so...after the lust and the burning passion is gone, what is there? love? desire? true passions? and then, when i'm still alone, with no one to hold, no one to call mine, what then?

i keep hearing "you'll find someone", "you'll find it when you least expect it", i want to kill myself. how can i go on without being partially optimistic, partially hopefully? and im always on the look, always expecting. so does that mean im destined to be in solitude forever? while everyone has relationships lasting years, has flings here and there, has whatever they can get, i cant even meet guys as friends. i feel like while time goes on, everyone is pairing up and im the single remainder of the human race.

ive thought of taking my life through and through. i know its not the solution. but i cant help thinking there's no point in life without love. its what makes us human. and to be denied of what makes me human, i feel like im not living.

as Queen says, "Just one year of love is better than a lifetime alone"